Chapter 10 "Response to Porn"

In my opinion porn is not a bad thing and people make it out to be something so horrible when really it's not that bad. You can go outside or to the zoo and see two animals mating and your first response is "OMG! They should be arrested."
If you don't like porn then don't watch it. In the passage it talked about how porn objectifies women and makes them look bad. It's their job though and it's something they are willing to do. I mean I could sit there and say garbage men stink because they deal with garbage all day or that all strippers are sluts, when clearly neither of those are true. And women are also not the only people in the video, men are in it too and they are not viewed as any differently. I don't know I just think it's stupid how much people judge others.

Response to "Resisting Violence Against Women"

Chapter 10 talked about gender violence, cyber stalking, rape and battery/physical abuse and much more. I found this chapter sort of disturbing. It's very straight forward and right to the point.

When it talked about gender violence it made me realize that it's getting worse and worse as time goes on because kids today are more rebellious and they really don't care. A lot of children are more spoiled now a days and they don't take pride in what they do therefore they really don't care.

Cyber stalking is pretty much the new and improved way to stalk a person. The internet is a dangerous place and many people do not realize this and they tend to post information such as their full name and address and phone number, which just initiates stalking. It's now a lot easier to do in our time period. And many people fake who they really are.

Cyber stalking goes in coordination with rape. This is because it is how predators and rapists get to their victims. Both are very serious topics and can get a person into a lot of trouble.

Both of these could also lead into battery and physical abuse. There is a list of reasons why women stay in abusive relationships and to me #4 stands out the most and it's that: "they worry about what other people think" and I think this is sort of stupid because they must be insecure about themselves, they shouldn't care what other people think. I guess I can't fully speak for this though because I have never been in an abusive relationship before and I guess I wouldn't really want anyone to know if I was either.

Response to "The Politics of Housework"

Pat Mainardi's The Polictics of Housework really made me realize how lazy men are. Not only that but there are set chores that men and women each have. After reading this article it really made me realize this a lot too with my parents. For example, it's rare to see a women cutting the grass or for men to be doing the dishes. In my opinion, women get all the dirty work, men are lazy. Like Mainardi stated typical chores are "doing laundry, doing dishes, and just cleaning in general." When she broke down each of the men's quotes it made me realize that her meaning is exactly, or at least close to what I would have thought he meant as well. Like when Mainardi quotes "I don't mind sharing the housework, but I don't do it very well. We should each do the things we are best at." I would have interpreted this as, let's do what we each do best, because I would rather not clean or do laundry, which links to her meaning as well.

The postscript was very deep and broken down well I thought. I would actually love to see a men's point of view on housework and how they would interpret what women say to them about it. I guess reading it from her point of view, sort of makes me agree with her more because I have seen such chores being split up like that myself and that she is a women and what she says is basically something all women could agree with.

I did actually find an article about men doing housework http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/08/090805142905.htm. This article basically states that men that do and share the housework with women are more likely to get and keep a girl. I just found it interesting and thought it fit well with the Mainardi article.

Response to "Partners as parents"

When Charlene Gomes talks about custody it's really a hard topic. The government looks at custody as the "best interests" for the child. This is the part that really offends me the most, I know at a certain age you can chose if you want to live with one parent or the other, but if the child is old enough to make the decision on their own they should be able to chose. The "best interests" should go for infants only. And from reading Charlene Gomes passage on custody I realize now that it is even harder when you have the same sex parents. I know they have the Nexus approach, which still mainly looks for the best interests of the child. In my opinion, the best interest of the child would be to have them choose who they want to live. This is because for example they may have a harder time growing up with a parent they can not get along with. This also ties in with child support.

I know this wasn't discussed in the chapter but I strongly agree with child support with goes towards the whole custody thing. If both parents have the child they should both be responsible to support it whether they are together or not. Both parents should have to pay and raise their child financially.

In conclusion, I think children should get to pick who they want to live with, and that child support should be paid in order to have both parents fully responsible for their child.

Response to "Marriage and Love"

In Emma Goldman's passage "Marriage and Love" on page 396 it talks about 'how about marriage and love and have nothing to do with each other'. I agree with this statement because you can be in love with someone and not be married and you can also be married and not be in love with them. For example, you can see this in things such as forced marriages where they are married because the family has arranged it and they are not necessarily in love with their significant other. I am not saying that they will not ever love this person they may not at first but like Emma Goldman states 'it is rare one does hear if miraculous case of a married couple falling in love after marriage'. I also agree that marriage has a lot to do with the 'economic  arrangement, an insurance pact'. For example, how men or women marry another for things that they may not have such as money or they could be getting married because their significant other is perhaps in the military, where there a member makes more almost or nearly double when he/she is married and their significant other also makes money as well.

A lot of the time I feel that the word love is often mis-used and people just say it because they think it's something the other person wants to hear. I, myself and I am sure some of you can also agree that most of use have been in or is in one of these relationships now. The type where in the end the guy tells you he loves you and that he is going to marry you in the future, then a month later so or he breaks up with you for someone else. I guess in a girl's point of view marriage is something we dream about and when a guy tells me that it just gets your hopes up so high and then they are shattered, making you think is love, or marriage even worth it...

"In Search of the Elusive Orgasm"

Lori L.Tharps' "In Search of the Elusive Orgasm" really grossed me out. I mean I know it is a real story I just don't think i would feel comfortable sharing information like that to, not only my friends and family like she did, but also publicly which we see in her writing in the Young Wives' tales. I understand where she is coming from when she blames herself and her husband, but I mean it's really no one's fault and you honestly shouldn't risk your marriage because of something like that. I just feel like if it happens, it happens. And sometimes couples expect so much out of the other that they forget about the important things such as love and friendship, etc.

"What Girls Want"

When I read Caitlin Flanagan's "What Girls Want" I never really realized the sexual tensions that are portrayed in the Twilight movies. Twilight grew a lot over the years and has a wide range of audience who now read and watch the movies. I know restrictions really can't be made on books but I feel like somehow we need a way to have younger audience such as children under 13 to not read it. I feel like now that I read "What Girls Want" it made me more aware of all the sexual tension and pressure Bella has towards Edward and in New Moon, even Jacob. And in my opinion the younger audience shouldn't be reading or seeing some of this, such as the sex scenes and some parts of the movie are also very violent. I know the movies are doing a good job at keeping this more of a PG with not being as gruesome as the book or as sexual. However, in the movie there are a lot of the long stares and in the last three movies kissing romantically and at sometimes it seems almost violent.
Even the way the vampires are portrayed is pretty much what every girl wants. From their looks to their personality it what every girls dreams of finding. And when Bella is stuck between Edward's love vs. Jacob's love it despite the fact that they are both or can both be monsters she still chooses one of them. This is awkward to most people because Bella could easily find a different, normal guy at her high school.
I guess Caitlin Flanagan's article really made me realize and look more closely at the things we are reading and watching, and to I guess, keep an eye out of things that you wouldn't imagine.